Saying Thank You and Sorry
The short English phrases for thanking and apologising — and how to reply when someone says them to you.
Thanking and apologising happen many times a day in English, far more often than in many other languages. Not saying them can sound cold, even when you are being perfectly polite in your own language.
Saying thank you
- Thanks. — short, friendly, everywhere
- Thank you. — slightly more formal
- Thanks a lot. / Thanks very much. — bigger thanks
- Thank you so much. — warm, for a real favour
- Cheers. — British, informal, means thanks (not only a toast)
To say what you're thanking for, use for + noun or -ing:
Thank you for your help. · Thanks for coming. (not "thanks for come")
Replying to thanks
You must reply. Silence sounds unfriendly.
- You're welcome.
- No problem.
- That's all right. / That's OK.
- Not at all. (more formal)
- Any time. (warm, for a small favour)
Saying sorry
English uses sorry for two different things:
An apology — you did something:
Sorry, that's my fault.
I'm sorry I'm late.
Sorry about the noise.
Sympathy — nothing is your fault:
I'm sorry to hear that.
I'm so sorry. (when someone tells you bad news)
How big is the apology?
Match the phrase to the size of the problem — over-apologising for something tiny sounds odd, and under-apologising for something real sounds careless.
| Size | Phrase |
|---|---|
| tiny (bumping someone) | Sorry. · Oops, sorry. |
| small (being five minutes late) | Sorry I'm late. · Sorry about that. |
| real (a mistake at work) | I'm really sorry. · That was my fault. |
| formal (writing, or serious) | I do apologise. · Please accept my apologies. |
Note that I apologise is a formal, written phrase. Saying it to a friend you kept waiting sounds strangely stiff.
Excuse me and sorry are different
| Phrase | When |
|---|---|
| Excuse me | before you do something — asking a stranger, passing someone |
| Sorry | after something has happened |
- Excuse me, is this seat free? (before)
- Sorry! (after you step on someone's foot)
Also: Sorry? with a rising voice means I didn't hear you — please repeat. It is not an apology.
Replying to an apology
- That's all right.
- No problem.
- Don't worry about it.
- It's fine.
- These things happen.
A note on British "sorry"
In Britain sorry is used far beyond apology. People say it when you bump into them, when passing behind someone, when asking a question, and simply to soften a sentence: Sorry, could I just squeeze past?
None of this admits fault. Treat it as a social lubricant rather than an apology — and if someone says sorry to you for no obvious reason, the expected reply is just sorry back, or a smile.
Thanking and apologising are expected, not optional. In English these phrases mark the boundaries of a small social exchange, so leaving one out is noticed even when nothing rude was said. If you are unsure whether a situation calls for it, it almost certainly does — the cost of one extra thanks is nothing.
Small politeness that matters
Add please to requests, and English speakers expect it more than you might think:
Two coffees, please.
Could you help me, please?
Both, in thirty seconds
A: Sorry — is this seat taken?
B: No, go ahead.
A: Thanks. Sorry, could I just get my bag past you?
B: Of course. There you go.
A: Thanks very much.
B: No problem.
Two sorrys, neither of them an apology, and two thanks, both of them answered.
Test yourself
The quiz below checks which phrase fits which moment.